Depressed Divas: A Rant About Social Media

Depressed Diva

How often do we see the word “depressed”, being misused? If you’re on social media, then the chances are, you’ll have seen it strewn around carelessly; like dirty socks in a teenager’s bedroom. An acquaintance you met at a party, posts a status about how “depressed” they are, because they can only get their eyeliner straight on one eye.What do I say to that? Lucky them.

They’re lucky, because they can pinpoint the reason they’re feeling “depressed.” If I had a pound, for every time I’ve spluttered “I don’t know” at my husband, whenever he’s asked why I’m sobbing over my Spaghetti Bolognese; I’d be writing this post from a yacht on the Caribbean Sea.

For people like me, depressed is the mood we’re perpetually locked in. We wake up depressed, go to work depressed, eat our meals depressed and go to bed depressed. Whether or not our eyeliner is straight, is of no consequence to us. If we were to write those kind of statuses on social media, they’d go something like this: “I’m depressed, and I have no idea why. I should be happy and I should be grateful for everything that I have. But I’m not. I’m absolutely destroyed, and I don’t want to be here anymore.”

And do you know what response we’d get? Not the same response these attention-seeking divas get, that’s for sure. There’d be no emojis blowing kisses, or sporting angry faces.There’d be no encouraging comments – there’d be nothing. We’d probably even be a few dozen friends and followers lighter. Bottom line: post an overly-dramatic status, about how you want to kill yourself, because your handbag doesn’t match your shoes, and the world is fully behind your “struggle.” But post an honest status about how you want to kill yourself, because every day, you feel like a contestant on Takeshi’s Castle and ending your life seems to be the only way to win the game against the Emerald Guard in your head; and you’re on your own.

I know I’m probably being a bit insensitive – or even too sensitive, but I’m so sick of mental illness being trivialised on social media. Yeah, bad eyeliner happens to good people, but so does mental illness. The difference is, bad eyeliner never killed anyone.

 

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19 thoughts on “Depressed Divas: A Rant About Social Media

  1. TheWorryGames says:

    I’m sorry for your frustrations. There are definitely a lot of attention seeking people on social media, that’s for sure. If I were you, I think I would look for some new friends. I can’t imagine posting something like that and feeling like none of my “friends” would even care or that one friends might even “unfriend” me for speaking that way. In my mind, its better to have no friends at all then people who just don’t give a crap. I have been thinking about this a lot lately and I think I am going to do a massive FB overhaul and only keep the friends who I feel like actually give a damn about me. I have several that do, but most of my FB friends don’t. It just doesn’t feel right to open up my whole life to those people who don’t really care about me – who just consider me a number to increase their “friend count”. Thank you for a thought provoking piece.

    Liked by 1 person

    • carolinecassidy84 says:

      Thank you for your comment. For the reasons outlined, I don’t really use Facebook anymore. I have a few friends that I can call or text if I need anything. I just sometimes get frustrated with the people on my friends list, when they go down the attention seeking road.

      Like

  2. Dan says:

    And that’s the paradox, social media is a disease. Yes now we can share whatever thought that passes through our heads, but did we really need to? And what for those of us who take writing seriously? We have to fight through endless posts about how great food is and un-shocking candid snaps of celebrities who shouldn’t be admired in the first place. Every phone has an HD camera, that means every tool with a cellular device is a ground breaking film maker. Viral videos are supported strongly enough for a couple of teens with a speech impediment become famous and wealthy for their incredible video of….Vans?
    Unfortunately it’s not just depression that is thrown around lightly, it’s pretty much everything. As we grow as a society, we equally build upon and destroy what we make leaving us with, well Kyle Jenner mostly.
    As someone who periodically struggles with long depressive episodes, I feel close to what you’ve written. I feel alienated to this world.
    At least Takeshi Mike is still around.

    Liked by 1 person

    • carolinecassidy84 says:

      I feel your frustrations, Dan. When you’re trying to forge a successful career in the arts, seeing someone have a piece about the secret life of Kim Kardashian’s eyebrows published in a popular magazine, or a video about a pair of Vans going viral; does leave us scratching our heads. Maybe we’re missing something? Or maybe our problem is, we see too much. The work we’re doing isn’t discovered, because we’re probably missing a trick. I may start using tags like “Kardashian,” “Jenner,” “fleek” or “eyebrows on point” in my future blog posts and wait for the vitriol in the comments section, because I’ve hoodwinked the shallow brigade, into reading a post that has nothing to do with Z listers or eyebrows. Haha!

      Like

  3. carolinecassidy84 says:

    An anecdote, that I didn’t include in my post and I wish I had; involves my friend, who recently attempted to take her own life. She has been open and honest on social media,about her attempt and I’m very proud of her, for speaking out about it. A mutual friend of ours made a comment to me, about how our friend shouldn’t be “broadcasting” her suicide attempt online. The person who made this comment, is someone who posts statuses about how a bit of bird shit on her car is “ruining her day.” I wonder if there’s a Bird Shit Victim Helpline she can call, or a National Bird Shit Prevention Day she can take part in?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. kylieandkitreviewit says:

    Loved this, been struggling with depression for the past 5 years and it really is sad to see all the attention grabbers out there. If they were actually depressed they wouldn’t post about it. Following your blog and looking forward to future posts. Keep your head up love.

    Liked by 1 person

    • carolinecassidy84 says:

      Thank you for your kind words. I agree – people who are genuinely depressed, don’t talk about it on social media. It’s a sad fact, that we don’t feel we can be open and honest about our depression. I hope you’re doing well, and I hope you find my blog useful.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Laura May says:

    Reblogged this on Laura May and commented:
    This is so true. I’ve given up reaching out to people on social media when I genuinely feel suicidal, because people just judge you s attention seekers…but say i want to die because i embarrassed myself in asda, and everyone’s loving it!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Laura May says:

    This is so true. I’ve given up reaching out to people on social media when I genuinely feel suicidal, because people just judge you s attention seekers…but say i want to die because i embarrassed myself in asda, and everyone’s loving it!
    One day i’ll figure a way of putting into words my frustration of people who use social media as a comfort blanket, so they’re almost the opposite of the eye liner attention seekers and seem to love dwelling in the “depression” label. I have enough labels to live with, i accept i have depression but i sometimes find the constant posting of memes and “how hard it is” can actually just make you look even more. But there’s no middle ground…:/

    Liked by 1 person

  7. A Busy Bees Life says:

    Without going into too much detail, I can relate to your post so well. A lot of people dont know how to differentiate between being depressed and just feeling down or sad. They do not know the constant struggles and confusion that comes with dealing with depression because of the stigmas attached to it. I recently wrote a post about people who inspire me. One of those is Kevin Breel. A young comedian dealing with depression. Here is the link to my post http://www.abusybeeslife.com/5-interesting-people-that-inspire-me/ you can read it and click on the link included in the post to watch his very inspirational TED talk about depression. I hope you continue to be just as strong as you can be, and are surrounded by understanding love one. xoxox S.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. imnotgrandpa says:

    Caroline your post intrigued me because depression is misunderstood in our society. My cousin was diagnosed as a child and her parents were unable to comprehend the diagnosis. The response was “what does she have to be depressed about.” The word is misused and misunderstood. While I’m not a fan of most rants because they are mostly tantrums, yours is justified.

    Liked by 1 person

    • carolinecassidy84 says:

      Hi Frank. Depression is misunderstood and dismissed, whenever sufferers don’t have any tangible reasons, for feeling the way they do. I for one, wish depression was that simple. How is your cousin?

      Like

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